A few weeks ago I was struck by a sudden sense of self-doubt. I had written something; I had taught something; I had said something; and none of the things felt all that fantastic. I thought 'ucch. I'm not sharp. I'm just meh.' Considering that the synagogues I work for always need another lesson, another dvar torah, another article, this is not a good feeling - the feeling of doubting your own ability.
I would assume almost everyone goes through this. The few folks who seemingly never doubt their own abilities are the types of person I might suggest one stay away from: cult leaders and con artists. People like that suffer from too little self-doubt, and it leads them to mistreat others. But I digress.
As the Torah turns away from the narrative story structure and into the realm of intricate details of priestly ritual and temple artifact construction, we get a little detail in Exodus 28:3 that gives an insight into human self-doubt. The Torah says "Next you shall instruct all who are skillful, whom I have endowed with the gift of skill, to make Aaron’s vestments."
Rabbi Meir Shalom of Porishov said, 'There are those that seek to serve God, but simply do not believe in the powers of themselves, and they fear to approach. They say Who am I that can enter the palace of the King? On this the Torah teaches "whom I have endowed with the gift of skill." Thus all are fitting to wear the mantle to elevate to a place of holiness.'
God made us exactly as we are - with all the capability in the world to do great things. God endowed us with the gift of skill. We should use it. And if it isn't great the first time, then we must remember that God also endowed us with the gift of perseverance. Keep pluggin' away, my friends. Believe in yourself. God made you infinitely capable and immensely skilled, so that you might achieve great things.
I would assume almost everyone goes through this. The few folks who seemingly never doubt their own abilities are the types of person I might suggest one stay away from: cult leaders and con artists. People like that suffer from too little self-doubt, and it leads them to mistreat others. But I digress.
As the Torah turns away from the narrative story structure and into the realm of intricate details of priestly ritual and temple artifact construction, we get a little detail in Exodus 28:3 that gives an insight into human self-doubt. The Torah says "Next you shall instruct all who are skillful, whom I have endowed with the gift of skill, to make Aaron’s vestments."
Rabbi Meir Shalom of Porishov said, 'There are those that seek to serve God, but simply do not believe in the powers of themselves, and they fear to approach. They say Who am I that can enter the palace of the King? On this the Torah teaches "whom I have endowed with the gift of skill." Thus all are fitting to wear the mantle to elevate to a place of holiness.'
God made us exactly as we are - with all the capability in the world to do great things. God endowed us with the gift of skill. We should use it. And if it isn't great the first time, then we must remember that God also endowed us with the gift of perseverance. Keep pluggin' away, my friends. Believe in yourself. God made you infinitely capable and immensely skilled, so that you might achieve great things.
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